Let’s start by observing it’s not rocket science. Not even cooking science. Anyone could make it. Even me. Basically it’s 500g of ordinary beef mince mixed with a bit of this and that and then baked in an oven at 180 degrees c for an hour. The taste vs effort ratio is so good I’ll certainly make a habit of making it. And this is how:
- Baking powder 1 tsp
- Baking pan, loaf shaped
- Beef mince 500g
- Bowl 1 (in which to combine all edible ingredients)
- Bread 2 or 3 slices
- Chilis 3 red or green (I used about 50g of a tube of Red “Hot” Chilli stir-in paste)
- Coriander a small bunch (I used about 50g of a tube of stir-in paste)
- Cumin 1 heaped teaspoon
- Eggs 1
- Electric whisk / bamix (to shred/blend the the onion and any other solid ingredients like parsley, chills, etc. beyond recognition)
- Garlic 3 cloves (or I used about a TBSP of paste)
- Heat 180c
- Love, just a little bit
- Milk 1/2 cup
- Onion 1
- Parsley a small handful (or 50g from a tube …)
- Paprika a good healthy shake
- Pepper (freshly ground black pepper = best) about 1 tsp
- Salt 1 tsp
- Time 60 minutes
- Tomato paste 50g
Grief, how did the list get so long?! Ok, getting all this together’s the hard part, but, if you don’t have everything above, don’t stress, improvise.
Now for the fun part:
Set oven to 180 degrees.
Put the bread and milk in the bowl. Peel the onion and blend it in a suitable blender. Strip the seeds out of the chilli , and blend with the onion. Blend in coriander, parsley, etc. Add this eye-watering (yes you’re probably crying by now.. cause I was) concoction to the bowl. Put everything else in the bowl.
Now put your hands in the bowl and mix everything together with love. Maybe a couple of tears will drip in also. Thanks, onion.
Transfer mixture to greased loaf pan (I used a soft silicon pan) and shove it in the oven. Wash hands. Wipe eyes. Kick back for 45 minutes. Have a look. Should be getting nice and dark brown by now. Maybe it’s ready, or maybe it needs 15 more minutes. Depends on your oven. Crack open a bottle of red wine and start drinking in eager anticipation. Or maybe not. Bake some potatoes in the microwave and make a salad.
After about 60 minutes … enjoy, with caution. It just might be deliciously addictive.